I love meeting the veteran residents of Nosara. They are a wealth of knowledge and wisdom. They have endured all and still triumph with the priority to make this jungle beach their home. In a quick run to the school’s office, I met a friendly face. We spoke for an hour and a half and I just kept thinking to myself “write this down.” I like this person in particular because he seems to have adapted in the best possible way. He is fully integrated. He has a skill set, a sharp business sense but he has also given way to the Costa Rican way of doing things. His wife is from this area which I’m sure helped his rapid integration into the life, manner and people.
His descriptions were articulately filled with understanding and appreciation for the flow of things here. He shared the Costa Rican version of “Insha’Allah” (Arabic for God Willing). The Arabic phrase connotes “what will be, will be” but the Costa Rican attitude takes it a step further to “when it happens, it will be.” He said, “you cannot come here asking why things work this way because they just do.” You work the system the way it works or it works you out.
I see that here. I see it in some of the longer term North Americans and some of the new families as well. There is an expectation with North Americans that things should run a certain way. They resist the system here, they try to change it or be above it and they stand out. They not only seem remarkably rigid in this context but they also carry a critical tinge of bitterness.
“An idle mind is the devil’s workshop” implies my new friend. The people who cannot maintain work or don’t have to fall prey to the dangerous assumptions, rumors and conjecture that ruin even the best intentions and are rampant in small towns. This leads him to two valuable points about negotiating anything in Nosara: individual experience and understanding the local mentality.
He said,
“Everybody will recommend somebody to you for something. What you have to realize is that relationships and experiences are individual. I may have a great transaction with somebody, I recommend them to you and you have a bad experience.” For example, somebody helped me find a good deal on a reliable car. I recommend him to you but it turns out that your car has a lot of problems. This was not intentional but it is a risk imbedded in the scenario. I asked him how people retaliate and I loved his answer: in not so many words he said, they slice into his Pura Vida. Instead of accepting the inevitability of circumstance in Nosara, they return resentment. He said, “I don’t need that. I am just at the beach with my family and these are my moments.” I was moved that his perception of a sour situation was one that impacted his cherished daily moments.
With obvious insight he said that Costa Ricans are happy and kind people. They are not direct or confrontational; they are sensitive and will express their emotions in manner than appears round-about or passive aggressive. That is a valuable tip for approaching the locals with any concern. They want reciprocated respect and patience in the spirit of camaraderie.
So few can tap into this perfect balance between the two worlds. He has learned how to work his needs into their way with an acceptance that is neither compromised or betrayed... and he seems quite content.
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